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Posted 12/18/19 (Wed)

Maybe you noticed that I didn’t get a column in last week. I apologize. It’s not my fault.
Well, in a way it is. You see, I was in Las Vegas. Sin City. The city that never sleeps. Or is that New York? I get mixed up. Two things you will never find in Las Vegas are clocks and business centers in a motel. I’m not real tech savvy. I know you find that hard to believe, but it is true. I can’t sit down with an ipad or my phone, take a fat finger, tap out a column and send a message out to the newspapers. I have to sit down in a comfortable chair, in front of a computer, within hollering distance of Shirley and write my column. Preferably with a cup of hot coffee and the sound of bacon frying in the background.
Anyway we were in Vegas to watch Gracy, our granddaughter rope calves. She had qualified for Vegas’s Tuffest Roping at a qualifier in Bowman. She didn’t place, but trust me, we think she was the greatest!
I haven’t traveled a lot the past few years. I hate airports. I hate the itty-bitty seats on airplanes. I hate the cost of a cocktail at an airport. I hate standing in line at checkout. I hate the itty-bitty toilets on the airplane. I hate the dry pretzels and the dry cookie that is supposed to pass as a meal. That’s a lot of hate for an easygoing cowboy.
Because I haven’t traveled a lot in recent years, when we were packing we couldn’t find my shaving kit. I just haven’t used it recently. When it was located, I threw it in my bag and I was ready to roll.
We got up at 4 a.m., to catch our flight to Denver. Good connections and we were in good shape. I headed right for a poker table. All day. Way into the night. And into the next morning. At 3 a.m., I reported back to our room. No, I didn’t win. I knew you would ask.
Over the years, I’ve developed the habit of rising between 4 and 5 a.m. Which is fine. Unless you went to bed at 3 a.m. Then it sucks. But it happens.
So at about 5 a.m., I got up and showered, reached in my long forgotten shaving kit, took out my toothpaste and brushed my teeth. It was horrible. But I figured it was the lack of sleep and the combination of free drinks that were handed out at the poker table.
I just couldn’t get that taste out of my mouth all morning. Later in the day, I was back at the room and going to brush again. The tube was still lying there, smiling gleefully at me. It was a tube of cortisone cream for a rash I had developed years ago. I tell you what, if you ever have itchy teeth, try that stuff. My teeth haven’t itched since.
One long night in Vegas, and the next three days I was in bed by 8 p.m. And down for breakfast, showered and shaved, with nice white, non-itching teeth by 5 a.m. And I am still trying to catch up on my sleep a week later.