September 12, 2017


As I write this, Hurricane Irma is winding down. Still pounding northern Florida and up into Georgia, but it appears the worst is over.
I understand most of the areas shut down operations when the wind reaches 45 mph. That is right. 45 mph. I know the winds are dangerous, but if we shut down emergency services when the wind reached 45, there would be no use having ambulances or fire trucks in Harding County!
I have several friends who live in Florida. Mostly in the Ft. Myers and Naples area. They often kid me about staying in North Dakota. I also have several friends who retired to Arizona. They evidently are better managers than I am. I’m kind of like Doug, a friend of mine. He said he could retire and do anything he wants the rest of his life. But he would have to die by Tuesday!
Shirley and I visited our Florida friends a couple years ago. It was one of the nicest places I have visited. A friend told me the only people that retired to Arizona were the ones that had never visited Florida. I called him the other day. He was wishing he hadn’t said that.
The other day I wrote about my “not being the brightest bulb in the closet.” I think I found someone dumber than I am.
I was watching the coverage of the hurricane. They were forecasting 125 mph winds and a storm surge of 8-10 feet. I’m not real smart, but I know that in a 125 mph wind and 10 feet of water, a trailer house (I live in one) is not a real good place to be.
Anyway, this newscaster was interviewing a couple people that lived in a trailer court on the Florida Keys. They lived in a mandatory evacuation area. They were determined to ride the storm out.
The reporter was incredulous. She warned them that if the storm surge reached 10 feet, their trailer would be underwater. One of the residents replied that they had a homemade boat. A homemade boat. I wouldn’t go out on Lake Sakakawea in a homemade boat. And they were going to ride out a hurricane.
But that wasn’t the worst. One family was going to ride it out in their trailer and wasn’t too concerned. Because, now listen to this, they weren’t too concerned because they had some air mattresses. Air mattresses!
I tried to ride on an air mattress in a swimming pool in Mexico with a drink in my hand. When a fat guy jumps in the pool, it created a wave that tipped my air mattress over! How in the heck are you going to survive the Atlantic Ocean, or the Gulf of Mexico, on an air mattress in 125 mph winds?
I hope they made it. And I really hope they don’t reproduce.